College Isn’t A Zoo: Why College Tours Suck

Graphics by Anika Dua

We’re fresh off of Spring Break and pushing through to the second half of the semester. Seems pretty easy to get through, right? Wrong. We are exhausted, swamped with work, and on top of that– I can’t help but notice the fact that we are on display. 

I’m sure we’ve all had these experiences: trying to get to classes, and a tour group is blocking the one path you need to take. Or being stopped and asked about how Syracuse is as a university and you kinda have to fake it so you don’t ruin someone’s dreams.

It’s the height of the touring season and we just can’t catch a break.

That first Monday back in classes, I had the delight of seeing a group in Schine and I could already tell I was being watched. You can spot them from a mile away, especially with the orange tote bags they carry around like caution vests. 

The tours are definitely an inconvenience because it feels like we are in a zoo being watched by visitors. It’s giving… unpaid labor, since we work so hard to keep up appearances, but whatever.

Another thing, they shouldn’t be allowed to give tours during snowstorms or on rainy days. Not only does everyone look stupid during poor weather, but I personally have almost been impaled by a damn umbrella just because a visiting student had it under their arm and they weren't paying attention. I’m not gonna lie– I think that’s where my villain era started with these tours. 

The most unsettling part of the whole endeavor: the parents are always watching you. It’s very intimidating, to be honest, especially when all we wanna do is be left in peace. You could just be eating a sandwich on the first floor of Schine, and you look up to notice your one moment of peace has become a spectacle for strangers.

Anyways, we have a few more weeks to go before we’re home free for break. At least those touring will get the true Syracuse experience by seeing us all in our prime miserable states. 

Go orange, I guess.