Get the Rock a New Wig
Graphic by Emma Novy
Disney’s Moana wasn’t just another animated hit—it carried real weight. For many Polynesian viewers, it was one of the first times their cultures, stories, and environments were centered in a major global film. That matters. Representation isn’t just about visibility; it’s about respect, accuracy, and pride. And when you attach a figure like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson—arguably one of Hollywood’s most recognizable Polynesian actors—you amplify that impact even more. He’s been in dozens of films, from action blockbusters to family comedies, and for a lot of audiences, he is the face of Polynesian identity in mainstream media. So pairing him with a story like Moana? It brings attention, legitimacy, and a built-in audience.
And then you make it live-action. Fine. Whatever. Risky, I thought we had enough of those, but fine. But then, one day, I'm on the internet and I stumble upon the Rock as live action Maui. And you give him that wig?!?!?!?! What is going on? Have you ever met a polynesian? Is that what you think our hair looks like? Why does it look like it got a blowout with a Dyson Airwrap five minutes before filming? Did they just take out his velcro rollers? And worse—why does it look like it was CGI’d onto his head like Henry Cavill’s infamous not-mustache situation?
This isn’t even new. There’s a pattern here. I have yet to see the rock look natural with hair. Go back to The Scorpion King—they practically glued three pin-straight strands onto his scalp and called it a day. Then Hercules—and let’s be honest, that lion headpiece was doing a lot of heavy lifting. Strategic. Protective. Almost like they knew. And now this? This is what we land on for Maui?
It’s not just bad—it’s aggressively bad. Painful to look at. Offensive to the eye. And considering how important this character is culturally, it starts to feel borderline offensive. And this close to AAPI Heritage Month? Really?
At this point, I can think of multiple things that would genuinely look better with that wig—or deserve a better one. A literal rock. A Labubu doll. A bush outside or downstairs. My roommate’s bald dad—shoutout Brandon. Even a Toyota Corolla with those little car eyelashes would pull it off better.
Which leads to a simple conclusion: maybe he’s just meant to be bald. Smooth. Clean. Unburdened by whatever that was. Not every character needs a flowing mane, and clearly, not every wig is worth the effort. Sometimes less is more. Brandon understood that.