Have a Heart

By: Lianna Hursh

Breakups are never easy, but there’s a right way and a wrong way to go about them. Relationships have a total of two potential outcomes—you break up, or you get married. Though it’s not always that black-and-white, if you can tell from day one that you will never walk down the aisle with the college cutie, go ahead and nip that one in the bud.

With that said, every victim of a breakup deserves an honest explanation as to why the relationship went to absolute shit in T-5. “It’s not you, it’s me” is not going to cut it. Like, get real— it’s you, so at least provide an honest explanation to your former BF/GF so that they can reach closure with the relationship more easily, and hopefully have better luck next time.

To start, pick an appropriate time and place. It’s probably not the best idea to drive to the spot where you and your soon-to-be ex had your first kiss, and hit them with “so, this isn’t working.” Also, try to avoid that phrase. Be clear about why you’re unsatisfied. Relationships aren’t like toys, they don’t just stop working—unless you’re dating Buzz Lightyear. And if that’s the case, just change the fucking batteries.

Secondly, have the conversation in person. Remember: even though you may have checked out of the relationship already, this is literally breaking news to your partner, and you need to respect that. There is nothing more degrading than receiving a breakup text. “Just wanna let you know I don’t really love you anymore! LOL, sry!” It’s like, tbh idc, but say it 2 my face plz.

Make sure the conversation takes place in a private setting. Being broken up with hurts. Don’t make the wound ten times deeper by broadcasting the event to your friends like it’s an episode of MTV’s The Real World. In the real world, that is very uncool.

Again, remember to be open and honest with your partner. Try your best to have a constructive conversation, not an argument. When all is said and done, end on good terms. Holding a grudge is a waste of energy. Learn to forgive people for what they’ve done, and accept them for who they are. Sometimes a person who seems so “right” simply isn’t right for you. And hey, that’s okay.