How To Lose A Girl In Five Ways

By Laura Cohen

So, boys, you finally got with that girl you've been pining after. You may think it’s smooth sailing from here on out, but don’t get too comfortable just yet. Your seemingly genius strategy may in fact lead to your downfall.

Based on personal experience, friends’ horror stories, and plain common sense, here are the top 5 ways to ruin your chances with any girl. Translation: What not to do.

Showing off your “popularity.”

She is probably aware that you have friends. When walking through a crowd, please resist the urge to do your personal back-hand, shoulder-bump, fist-pound handshake with every single one of your bros. Focus on what's important here… (your girl, duh).

Gossiping about yourself.

No girl wants to walk by your pack of friends giggling like a bunch of little school girls, pointing at you saying, “That’s her! That’s the girl he was with last night!” Knowing you run and tell your friends every little detail about your sex life is a little uncomfortable, not to mention immature. If your friends can’t play it cool, you probably can’t either.

Playing too hard to get.

You may think waiting a week or two before sending a text will make her want you more, but by that point any girl will have moved on to the next one. Screw playing games here: make your move or else she’ll make hers—on someone else.

Being too clingy.

Now, please don’t take the previous example to such an extreme that you become a stage-5 clinger. You don't want to gain the reputation of a stalker by constantly texting “Where are you? What are you doing tonight? Hello? Are you there?” Put yourself out there once or twice, but repeatedly saying “Hey want to hang? I’m having a pre-game in my room, want to come? So you’ll be there? See you at 10?” is just annoying and will probably result in the blocking of your number.

Being super emotional.

This point is subjective. If you and a girl are not exclusive, don't throw a bitch fit if you find out she got with someone else. If you are exclusive, I do understand your disappointment, but there is no need to waste your tears on a girl who doesn’t like you back.

Sorry for the tough love, but you’ll thank me later.