“Ladies” Arm Wrestling

Bridezilla vs. Stilleto Southpaw throw down

By Sean Sweeney

At first, I thought I was reading about some crazy Halloween party in the Washington Post. Wildly-dressed women wearing top hats and nurse outfits, giving themselves alter egos like “Florence NightenHELL” and “C’ville Knievel.” All while obnoxious bystanders surrounded this inner circle of banshees who arm-wrestle each other.

Normally, The Greasy Pole's topics get as much play as Courtney Love, but this one’s appeal is much more promiscuous.

The Charlottesville Lady Arm Wrestlers league is coming, intent on converting more mothers, teachers and students into its ranks.

Turns out, two women created the league a few years ago. The rules: females only and everyone needed to wear costumes. The creators, Hoyt Tidwell and Jodie Plaisance, must have been drunk when they produced it, supposedly as a joke.

Now, nine cities have leagues. Women are clamoring to sign up and unleash their fury on anyone who wants some. Competitors let their creative juices go. They must’ve been shackled up too long; name examples include “Bridezilla” and “Stiletto Southpaw.”

One lady even arrives equipped with weapons, channeling her inner Lara Croft.

Heckling is encouraged and a band called “Straight Punch to the Crotch” plays while the women slam each other’s wrists onto the table. Also, one judge squats under the table to look at ass, and make sure it doesn’t lift from the competitors’ chairs.

The spectacle has grown in popularity so much that now some matches draw lines stretching out the doors. In one instance, people were sitting on nearby rooftops to view the action, craning their necks to get a look at the wrestling table. The arm wrestlers gave the crowd a little extra that night, one battle lasting completely through “Fight For Your Right (To Party).”

That match announced a crowd of 700. That’s more than ‘Cuse football draws.

Sean Sweeney is a regular contributor to The Greasy Pole.