Rabbit Hunting

A battery operated device has never felt better

Ladies, don’t just go at it like rabbits – go at it with Rabbits. I’m not radically trying to convince you that bestiality is the next logical step from female homosexuality, I’m talking about mutual masturbation for lesbians.

If you’ve ever attempted it, you know it doesn’t happen in thirty seconds at the exact same time to the climax of a pornographic beat like in nearly every episode of The L Word. YouTube search those ladies and be awed, They don’t even need a double-dildo strap-on to make simultaneous pleasure possible--their hands actually manage to do it all. Somebody find me one of those chicas.

Reality check, lezzies. Unless you’re super flexible, can concentrate on both your handiwork and your own vagina, and your bodies fit together exactly right, chances are you’re never gonna fuck like “Tibette” in bed.

Screw scissoring. That shit’s damn near impossible. And as for that double strap-on business, saddling up with plastic dicks poking and prodding every which way – get rid of it. Let’s talk about what happened to good old-fashioned wetness, to satisfying two clits at once. Put aside the heavy, messy phallic instruments for a night and invest in a masturbatory sex toy that is too often overlooked: the Rabbit.

Named for the animal it resembles, the Rabbit may sound like a sketchy, albeit comical, plaything. But feed it a couple batteries, adjust the vibration intensity, place the two “ears” at 10:00 and 2:00 around the clitoris and wait for results. It’s so easy a straight man could do it.

The rabbit also comes in many variations, so you never cum disappointed. Try a three-pronged rabbit for more kick. Experiment with them, and with your partner. Once you know what works for each of you, get comfy together and pleasure away.

You can take turns sitting on top of one another with the rabbit pressed between you in just the right spot. The person on top can also help the one on the bottom by holding rabbit number two in her favorite place. Or you could always use them as foreplay to work up to vaginal intercourse. Watching each other touch yourselves and witnessing the clitoral reactions can be an extremely sexy warm-up to a very fun-filled evening.

Trust me, it’ll take awhile for this act to get old. But if you start craving a little variety, look into a tongue dinger. It’s a vibrating nucleus that fits around your tongue with a loose-fitting rubber strap. I don’t think you need me to further explain what this little guy does. Similar to the rabbit, but minus the rest of the body, the dinger cures all female oral sex complications, especially the unfortunate short tongue curse.

These and other vibrating options for mutual masturbation exist at any adult shop, and even in Spencer’s at the Carousel Center in Syracuse. So quit suffering with frustrating lesbian bed death, treat your relationship to a shopping spree and try raising some rabbits.

Meghan Russell is a regular web contributor to Pride Fever