Let’s Talk About All the Sexual Tension in Christmas Movies

‘Tis the season for binging Christmas movies. Whether you’re into the classics, the animations, Hallmark movies, or ABC Family’s Freeform’s 25 Days of Christmas, there is one thing all these family-oriented holiday stories have in common: sexual tension. Just because these films are geared towards family doesn’t mean that they don’t have underlying sexual tones. Even these nice Christmas favorites can be a little a naughty.

Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas

When we think about this film and sexual tensions, we typically jump to the Grinch and Martha May Whovier. Who we neglect to think of is the Grinch and his companion dog, Max. There definitely are sexual tensions between the two, especially being alone together up at Mount Crumpit all day every day. The Grinch and Max have a dominant/submissive relationship, Grinchy being the dom and Max being the submissive. There’s no way to know what really happens up in the mountain overlooking Whoville, but peanut butter may or not be involved.

Elf

Buddy the Elf totally embodies the Christmas spirit, but he also might have a flare for incest. There definitely are sexual tensions between Buddy and his dad. Between buying his father lingerie and making a list of things to do together that ends in snuggling, something about their relationship is a little too jolly. Since Buddy’s dad is creeped out by the gestures, we can assume the sexual tension is not mutually recognized. But still, it’s there.

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

In the National Lampoon tales, Clark Griswald almost always has sexual tension with hot women that aren’t his wife –– which we might add is super . In this movie, there’s sexual tension between Clark and a cashier that’s beyond cringey. The fat cherry on top of his awkward laughing and jumbling of words is that Clark tells the clerk that he and his wife are divorced. Shocker, Griswald is not a DILF and more of a creep.

The Family Stone

This Christmas movie centers around a diverse family and an outsider. Everett Stone decides it’s time for his girlfriend Meredith to meet his family. No one particularly takes a liking to Meredith, that is everyone but Everett’s brother, Ben, who takes too much of a liking. Needless to say, the sexual tension between Meredith and Ben is enough to cut with a knife.

Jingle All the Way

This movie about trying to find a popular sold out toy for before Christmas… every parent’s worst nightmare. What makes being a father especially horrible for Howard Langston is that while he’s out trying to find his son a Turbo Man toy, his creepy neighbor Ted is macking on his wife, even eating her cookies (maybe a metaphor for something else, hmm). Regardless to say there is MAJOR sexual tension between Howard’s wife and the neighbor Ted, and it may or may not be mutual.