Dirty Talk: An Essential Bucket List of Every Spot You Should Fornicate in Before Graduation
As the semester wraps up, make sure to check everything off your 'Cuse bucket list before leaving campus. We're not talking about the Dome stomp either. Forget the must-do's—we've put together a list of places you must do it.
Here are some innovative ideas to help you go out with a bang.
The quad is the heart of Syracuse’s campus. People cross through it daily as they hurry to class. On warm days, you can see people sitting out there until the sun goes down. Nightfall is your time to shine. By around three a.m., the quad is silent. That's the time to howl like wolves and get your big O under the moon.
The Kissing Bench
Right outside The Hall of Languages is a bench meant for lovers. It’s known as the Kissing Bench. Legend claims if you sit on it with your lover and share a kiss, you will be together forever. If you sit on it by yourself, you’re doomed to be alone for the rest of eternity. If a kiss on the bench means you’ll be together forever and always, there's really no harm in going all the way.
The Carrier Dome
This is a classic must-do on your Syracuse bucket list. No relationship is complete without getting it on where the Orange fight and the fans cheer. Let's face it... it's called the Carrier Dome for a reason.
Whitman Team Room
Private and quiet rooms are the easiest places to get away with a quickie. Take a break from studying from finals in your closed space and teach eachother some knew material. It’s the best way to say bye-bye to your studies and hello to the summer.
Another place that locked you away for hours is the best place to revisit and plow through. Best time of the day is early in the morning when not many students are there. Take advantage of one of the upper floors. Sneak between the book stacks or secure a private room. The quieter the floor, the bigger the challenge—and the better the thrill.
Bathroom at Chucks
The infamous seniors-only bar. You probably can't remember many of your nights spent here, but you will never forget the time you and your partner put your own mark on those graffiti walls. Warning: don't let Ken the bouncer catch you. You'll probably be banned for life.
Newhouse Radio Room
These rooms are sound proof and locked. You can get as loud as you want and no one will know a thing. Best communications school? More like best sexual experience.
The Rose Garden in Thornden Park
Thornden Park isn’t known for being the safest at night. We recommend going to the rose garden under the gazebo in the early evening to stop and smell the flowers.
Roof of King David's on Marshall
Most people don’t know this, but between King David’s and Calio’s, there's a small alley. Behind the garbage cans is a ladder that leads to the roof. Climb up and all of campus is at your feet. The roof is huge and flat and the perfect place to get it on with a view. Just be super careful—it's a long drop.
Elevator of your Freshman Year Dorm
We all remember waiting ages for an elevator freshman year. They are slow, small, and the perfect place for a quickie. Go to your old stomping grounds and, well, stomp around.
Panasci Lounge Bathroom
Panasci is a low-key study area during the day. Not too many people are up there and it’s pretty quite. Go into one of the bathrooms and get it on. It will give you a thrill to know that others are studying and you’re humping.
Carnegie library is both big in space and beautiful in looks. It will give you the thrill of being in a building that is mostly for grad students. There are classrooms in the basement level and up a few floors. Find a empty room, turn the lights off and enjoy.
Faegan’s pub is a Syracuse staple... with single stall restrooms. Grab a pint, have some dinner, and save room for dessert, if you catch my drift.
Admissions Office Bathroom
Last but certainly not least, show Kent how much you appreciate all of his hard work by getting it on in an admissions office bathroom. I’m sure Kent will be as excited as he is about Castle tailgates.
Happy humping! One last note... while you and your boo go at it, do yourself a favor and use protection. Babies are a really expensive graduation present.