Hats That You Can't Keep a Lid On!
By Susanna Heller
Hats are truly the perfect accessories. Not only do they add an extra flair to any outfit, they also serve a functional purpose. Yet, for some, they can just look really awkward. I’ve always been envious of people who can pull off hats with ease. After 18 years of fruitless pulling, prodding, and parting, I came to the inevitable conclusion that I’m just not a hat person.
After one semester in Syracuse, however, I realized that attempting to survive winter here without a hat is idiotic. One trip to the mall later, my aforementioned theory was debunked. If you’re like me and feel there’s just no hat for you, I can almost guarantee that the root of your problems stems from a failure to shop for your face shape.
Those of us with weirdly-shaped heads need to stick together, and for that reason I present a comprehensive guide that should prove helpful when it comes to shopping for hats in a world that seems to ignore peculiar heads.
Beanie. You can’t judge a book by its cover, but you can judge a person by the kind of beanie they choose to wear. I don’t think you can go more than five minutes on campus without seeing someone sporting an ironic beanie with sayings like “Ain’t No Wifey.” The only question we should have regarding these knit caps is, are you wearing an ironic beanie to make a statement, or to hide your bad hair day?
Beanies we love:
For guys For girls
Fedora. Fedoras work best on people with square, pear, and oval-shaped heads. Head shape aside, it takes a certain kind of person to pull off a fedora without looking like a massive douche bag, (Jason Mraz being said type). I have to give props to the select few who can pull off a fedora without looking like they are about to spew romantic poetry or reference foreign films.
Fedoras we love:
For guys For girls
Berets. Adding a beret to any outfit is the easiest way to show everyone just how cultured you are. This look is best for girls with square or round-shaped heads who want to show the world that they can be très chic.
Berets we love:
For girls
Round Brim. As warmer weather slowly approaches, round-brim sunhats and baseball caps will surely become a summer fashion staple. They give even the most casual of outfits a more polished look, and tend to flatter oval, long, pear, and square-shaped heads.
Round brim hats we love:
Bucket Hats. Bucket hats are the perfect finishing touch to any guys’ going-out look. Not only can a bucket hat tell you a lot about someone, it’s extremely versatile. Bucket hats can be worn to any event, regardless of if you’re heading to a jungle-themed party on Walnut or a random basement on Euclid. Head shape doesn’t really matter in this case. The more you drink the better you will look...or so you will think.
Bucket hats we love:
For guys
Snap Backs. Basically anyone can pull off a snapback. Snapbacks are perfect for all college occasions, and the best way to show off school spirit—if you’re into that sort of thing.
Cowboy hats. I really don’t care what your face shape is—so long as we live above the Mason-Dixon line, there is never an appropriate circumstance in which you should un-ironically own a cowboy hat.