Sugar and Spice and Everthing Nice

By Bria Holness

As cold Syracuse winter nights approach, everyone seems to be setting their eyes on whom they’d like to hibernate with. But let’s face it — hibernating and cuddling can’t exist without a little sexing. If you’re planning to snag a cuddle/fuck buddy for the season and are getting your vag in tip top shape, with the waxing, shaving, wiping and washing, have you ever thought about how it may taste? Throughout their lives, girls are hounded with various tips and tricks about how downstairs should look, but are never really told how they should taste to keep bringing the boys back to the yard. And this is not just about pleasing your partner by giving them something sweet to nibble on. It’s more a matter of freshness, of wanting someone to enjoy performing oral sex on you.

Something that people don’t seem to take into mind is that vaginas taste and smell the way they do due to a combination of factors. These range from natural sweaty smells and the smell of the detergent you use, to the smell of the soaps you use and lastly the smell of your vagina's juices. So with all of that contributing to one taste and smell, obviously the first step you want to take in obtaining a delicious vagina is to thoroughly wash yourself and panties with fragrance-free detergents and soaps that don’t contain dyes. Those Island Breeze’s and Honey Vanilla’s will only clash with your body's natural scent.

Secondly, remember you reek what you eat. Changing your diet a few days before the weekend can make you taste a little sweeter when your partner’s head is buried in your opened legs. Things that should be avoided are cigarettes, coffee, junk food, and drugs. These same things that give your urine a distasteful odor so imagine what they would be doing to your vagina’s taste and overall smell. You should also cut back on alcohol, spicy foods, and red meat.

Including more papaya, cranberries, melon, apples, grapes, kiwi, strawberries, citrus fruits and, most especially, pineapple in your diet would contribute to a more delectable vagina. Cinnamon and mint might do something for you as well. But most importantly, make sure you’re drinking a lot of water; it flushes you out.

While keeping all this in mind, remember your vag will never taste like an ice cream cone, or dare we say Yogurtland. Still, don’t let that be an excuse to not improve the taste. If your partner is nice enough to go down on you, be nice enough to give them a reason to. If they really wanted a snack for their sweet tooth, they would go get a milkshake from Johnny Rockets instead.