The Problems with PDA


There are many things that single people can’t stand about happy couples. We get it; you’re so love-struck that you can’t keep your hands off each other. But publicly displaying affection for all to see is quite possibly the most annoying thing any couple could do. Being head-over-heels infatuated with one another is wonderful -- good for you! But making out and cuddling on the quad won’t make anyone unlucky enough to walk by think, “aw, how cute!”

Don't get me wrong; I’m not envious of couples that are openly smitten and show it. I doubt most other single-ish students are. Witnessing some PDA doesn’t make me jealous—it makes me furious. Here’s why:

It’s Disrespectful

Couples that PDA on the reg lack genuine respect for the people around them. The “cute” witty banter and playful teasing is distracting, especially if it takes place in an academic building. I don’t want to hear you pecking and playing with each other while I’m trying to study at the library or working on a project in a computer lab. Inappropriate touching should be toned down when you’re in public out of respect for those around you.

It’s Depressing

Witnessing PDA if you have just been dumped or if you are in a long distance relationship can make even the most chipper person feel like shit. Holding hands and giggling with your lover seems innocent enough, but it could cause a recent dumpee’s self-esteem to plummet. A friend of mine in a long distance relationship literally cringes every time she sees couples walking around campus obnoxiously because it makes her miss her boyfriend even more. It’s not that she’s jealous; she’s just lonely. Show some respect for the long distancers and the recently dumped and stop pretending your walk around the quad is a scene from “The Notebook.”

It’s (at times) Disgusting

If you and your lover are so turned on by one another that you feel the urge to make out whenever you’re together, you clearly have no self-control. If you are a student reading this, you are a grown-ass woman or man and you should be able to decipher what is and is not appropriate to do in public. I don’t want to see you take a break from holding hands and walking every fifteen feet to kiss each other, and I doubt anyone else does either. I’d just turn on “Jersey Shore” if I wanted to see two people maul each other with their tongues. All affectionate gestures that involve bodily fluids being swapped should be kept behind closed doors.

On a college campus, it’s always important to keep in mind how your actions affect the perceptions (and gag reflexes) of those around you. I beg you, all of you happy couples, kindly keep your hands to yourself.