How to Scam the College Guy of Your Dreams
If you're familiar with the ever-so-sly Joanne the Scammer (she is very present on Twitter and Instagram), then you know that no one can scam a man of his fortune better than she. Here is a step-by-step guide to how you can flawlessly seduce the guy or girl of your dreams… if only to devastatingly scam them out of money….
First is to narrow in on the man you want to scam…seduce. It's important that the recipient of your affection has a family fortune, a PayPal that you can access, and lives a very affluent lifestyle. If he doesn't meet any of these qualifications, then what the hell are you doing!? If all he has to offer you is a kind personality and complete adoration then it's a complete waste of your time. A compassionate soul and great smile aren't going to pay your student loans (assuming you're still in the process of scamming the financial aid office). Finding love is great and all, but running off with his millions is the ideal end result. And as Joanne notes, "I like my men like I like the economy: weak." She also advises all the ladies out there to not “cuff too early because your soul mate may be one of his homeboys.” So keep that in mind, and observe his friends to see if any one of them is worth scamming as well.
Making a man cry right now, let me text you back.
— Joanne The Scammer (@joanneprada) August 15, 2016
Once you've selected your target, remember to be as petty and problematic as possible. The wise Joanne says herself, “I don’t try to be perfect. I try to be petty.” Pettiness is important when you shatter someone’s heart into pieces. Organization is also a key skill to have, since you'll be balancing your time between your budding relationship and your occasional bank robberies.
Be positive, be Patient, be petty. — Joanne The Scammer (@joanneprada) October 11, 2016
Make sure you look flawless at all times. If Joanne can rob a 711 in pink stilettos and a fur coat, you can rob a boy of his heart in the same attire. It’s important to be messy, but only when it involves your affairs. Contouring your face beforehand is truly the scam before the scam. A blond wig is optional but preferred.
Love is messy, and you can be too. Scam on, ladies.
Remember ladies, when a man is sleep empty his pockets. pic.twitter.com/t6niAXZVf3
— Joanne The Scammer (@joanneprada) September 25, 2016