The Best April Fool's Day Pranks - in Bed
How do I play an April Fool's Day prank in bed that will rock his world?
First of all, I highly recommend against two things: telling him you’re pregnant and poking holes in his condoms. I’ve also never found much humor in informing someone that you have herpes. Those testicle-shrinking tips aside, however, here are some suggestions. Thank God I’m single, or else some poor schmuck would become my April Foolish sexual plaything.
1. Say you want to try role-playing, but suggest something really strange, like acting out the parts of Amish people. Go all out: buy a bonnet, and don’t forget to light a kerosene lamp to set the mood. Another idea? “Babe, I’ll be the priest, and you’ll be the little boy.”
2. While you’re having sex, flip around to reverse cowgirl or doggy style so you can sneak on a scary mask. This happened to me once: my guy decided to put on that creepy clown mask from Saw. If his reaction is anything like mine was, buying a Freddy Kruger mask is totally worth the investment.
3. Coat your lower abs with vinegar, but tell him it’s strawberry-flavored lube. Ask him to lick it off of you.
4. Pull a Jersey Shore and try the old “cheese in the bed” trick. Lift up his mattress and cover the bed with slices of cheese before replacing it. Try not to cringe or laugh when you get busy later and wait for him to notice the stench. Or, better yet, pretend you think it’s coming from him. “Honey, I think there may be something wrong with you. Normal people just don’t smell like rotten cheese.”
Happy pranking! We want to hear about your scandalous shenanigans, so leave any epic pranks in the comment section below. I hope utter foolishness abounds in your boudoir this April Fools Day.